It's just one gosh, darn thing after another, isn't it?
Have you begun to fondly refer to your growing middle bulge as your upper and lower stomachs?
Or perhaps your cleavage has headed so far south it's begun to cleave you in two?
Let's just ignore the fact that our eyesight has diminished to the point where driving in the rain or at night has become mission impossible.
Who would have thought that the most frequently used word in your vocabulary would become. . .
Unless, of course, you are a little more polished and polite than I am, then your phase might be, "Excuse me, what did you say? I can't hear you."
Growing up and growing old is sure full of surprises, isn't it?
It must be the collagen in your skin that has diminished to the point that your face is beginning to look like it is starting to melt off, right?
Did the airlines recently allude to the need for you to check your under-eye bags? (You can reduce those bags with specially formulated eye treatments 'ya know.)
Run, don't walk, to the nearest store and start using facial rejuvenation products that have a collagen stimulator ingredient to give it a long-term firming lift.
Answer honestly now. . .
(at least to yourself!)
Just how long has it been since that lean, mean stud was put out to pasture?
Are you concerned that man boobs may be lurking in the background threatening to attend a surprise coming out party?
Have you given up and let your eyebrows grow back into a uni-brow?
Yes, the aging process of growing up and growing old changes all of us in very many, inexplicable ways.
How do they manage to look so darn good and command such a graceful presence all the time?
How do they do it?
What's the secret to growing up and growing old gracefully?
In essence it all boils down to a matter of attitude and priorities. Honest!
You need to put yourself on your "to do" list! You need to roll up your sleeves and give yourself some spit and polish.
Go ahead. . .
Keep stomping your feet, whine a little louder, complain more emphatically and don't forget to repeatedly curse your age but for goodness sakes stop letting yourself go just because you keep adding on years.
You already know that it's not going to get any better.
In fact, your self-perfected art of growing up and growing old ungracefully will only continue to get worse.
Psst. . .
Is that really a nest of hair spilling out from your ears and nostrils?
And ladies, I am hesitant to tell a few of you but there seems to be a few extraordinarily long, thick whisker hairs sticking straight out on your chin.
It's time to make a plan!
Introduce a bit of grace into your aging process. It is mostly a state of mind anyways along with a few strategies and action steps that are relatively quick and painless. The better you feel about yourself, the better you are going to portray yourself, and the better you'll look and be perceived.
Feeling better about yourself actually creates this pleasant not-so-vicious circle of growing up and growing old gracefully rather than harrumphing yourself into the nursing home.
Let's face it, age only advances.
It is never going to retreat. You need to admit to yourself that you are never look 18 again. So, you might as well haul up those big girl panties or those tighty-whities, look yourself straight in eye and start pulling yourself together, however ungracefully.
Of course, you already know what you need to do. You just need a big swift kick in the kabunzies to get started.
Yes indeed, your Doctor does knows best. But, instead of trying to eat all the colors of the rainbow each and every day, try starting with just one. It is wise to begin to ration all those tempting delectable treats. (Ration is the operable word here.)
Keep well hydrated by drinking plenty of water instead of drowning your growing old sorrows in empty calories. And sorry, but no, caffeine and alcohol can't be considered a primary source to satisfy your body's daily hydration needs.
Stop sneaking into the handicapped spaces to park your car. Make yourself park further and further away from entrances. Stand tall, suck in your gut and walk briskly and purposefully to your destination.
Do a few stretches in the morning after you get up. Start with something really, really easy and simple like arching your back to relieve that pain you have been suffering from for the past several years or go completely wild and throw in a few trunk twists as you watch the news.
Slowly increase your daily movement until it can officially be considered "exercise".
Begin activities that include wildly swinging your arms in an effort to reacquaint yourself with the location of your toes, experiment doing sit-ups, kick-up those heels all the way into a series of vigorous leg lifts, jog in place enough to build-up a bead of sweat (however microscopic it might be) and maybe even venture outdoors to take a walk on the wild side (or at least down the block).
Pretty soon you'll begin to feel muscles firm and perhaps even that coveted six-pack will start to re-emerge from underneath that jelly belly.
Say goodbye to that overstuffed sausage bursting at the seam look (which, by the way, isn't a good look at any age) and shoot for more of a suave, sophisticated appearance.
Basically, all that means is selecting flattering clothes that fit you properly. Deep-six the well-worn, overly loved stretchy leggings with the extra short t-shirt that displays that muffin top for all to see, give away the minis that expose your dimpled butt cheeks, trade those over-sized cargo pants for a pair of chinos and for goodness sakes bury that tube top. Invest in simple classic, stylish clothes that highlight the positives and camouflage those areas that are a "work in progress".
Growing up and growing old ungracefully means that your ear hair has escaped to entwine with your bed head, your eyebrows have begun to look like a neglected caterpillar, your teeth haven't seen a whitening strip in eons and whiskers have sprouted up unattended in the most unusual places.
Get plucking, trimming, and moisturize yourself back into the beauty ballpark.
Start revitalizing your poor skin that has been drying out into a horribly wrinkly husk of its' former vibrant, youthful appearance by showing it a bit of lov'in. Check the expiration date on all of your skin care products. They expired well over a decade ago, haven't they?
Put your best face forward by investing in an anti-aging skin care regimen that will rejuvenate and give your skin a fresh, healthy glow. Get started here with an anti-aging basic skin care routine.
You might be aging but you're still a diamond, maybe roughed up a bit, but you can (and will) bring back the sparkle and shine hidden underneath all that 'pro' crastination and neglect.
Stand proud, throw-back your shoulders, hold your head high, suck in both your stomachs and gracefully glide into growing old.
Sue is also your instructor who provides the riveting and rejuvenating information on anti-aging skin care for The Skin Care e-Learning and Resource Center (this very helpful and amazing website!) for all those interested in throwing away the paper bag in the pursuit of growing up and growing old more gracefully.